On the HBO rewatch.
My thoughts on Girls and Insecure.
We have gotten to that time of year, at least for me, when the dark cold days blur into the dark cold nights, when all the energy we once had starts to wane and all we do besides work is fill the days until the Christmas break with friendmas dinners, office Christmas parties and with hours spent in bed or on the sofa, watching our favourite shows. Like the years before, I have embarked on many a rewatch of some the most interesting TV shows I have had the pleasure to watch. Comes as no surprise that earlier this year I rewatched Sex & The City for the 3rd time and before that, rewatched Desperate Housewives for only the 2nd time. Both incredible shows but admittedly, explore characters and lifestyles that are so far away from my reality.
Maybe it’s because I’m in my late 20s or because I’ve watched everything Netflix has to offer, I decided to rewatch Girls, written by the polarising Lena Dunham and I’m currently in the middle of my Insecure rewatch, written by the much loved Issa Rae. Both HBO shows, both starkly different but both wildly relatable and triggering. HBO has a knack for giving us legendary TV shows, particularly about navigating life as a woman, that stand the test of time. I documented some of my thoughts on my Girls rewatch on TikTok, but I wanted to get into some juicy specifics of both shows here.
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Girls HBO
I didn’t realise just how many other millennials revere Girls. Back when it first aired and all I could do was bootleg it via one of those random and dubious websites, the only person I had to talk about the show with was my 40-something year old aunt. Bizarrely, no one else around me had even heard of the show, let alone watched and loved it. But on TikTok, we all fam. I love seeing how the show has aged with all of us, how mad we still think all the characters are and how we oddly can relate to their stories now that we’re older.
Lena Dunham was ahead of her time
Say what you want about Lena Dunham, and I’m sure what you have to say is valid, but this lady is a great writer. Writing a show mainly about WASP womanhood in the 2010s based in gentrified Brooklyn, with a main character that has a bigger body this well, cannot be understated. Hannah, though awkward and self absorbed, never shied away from showing her body (often nude) off. Most noticeably, her body was never the punch line. On one hand, it’s annoying that we live in a world where this act is revolutionary in any way, but on the other, rewatching this as a 29yr old in 2024 made me appreciate this choice a lot.
None of these women would have been friends in real life
All four of the main characters are unlikable. Shoshana is probably the least unlikable but, she still has her quirks. The premise of the show is Hannah, Marnie and Jessa know each other from college (university) and Shoshana is the newest addition (she’s Jessa’s cousin). They’re a couple of years post graduation and making a life for themselves in New York, so it makes sense why they’re still friends to a certain degree. However, these women do not actually like each other. This comes to a head in the infamous bathroom scene at Shoshana’s engagement party. There’s much to be said about how proximity can keep you wedded to people you have naturally outgrown, especially in your 20s, but come on, they were all so terrible to one another!
Hannah and her writing
One of the biggest differences I noticed during this rewatch was how much I felt triggered by Hannah’s struggle to be a writer. I was 17 when the show first came out, still had an idealised view of what the future held for me and my dreams of writing for magazines, and one day writing my own book. Just under 12 years later and I can admit that chasing your dreams as a writer is hard. Most of the battle is between you and you alone. From losing her publishing deal because her editor died, to getting a hit piece in a major newspaper, the depiction of Hannah’s journey is all too relevant and true. Though I’d like to but cannot tell my 17yr old self that you are now a Sunday Times bestseller, I bet she’d be happy that this Substack exists, that my book manuscript is still a work-in-progress and my words have been published in a few major magazines.
Not everything needs diversity
At the risk of sounding like an anti-woke internet warrior, Girls did not need any diversity. One of the main criticisms of the show in recent years is how white it is, considering it is based in one of the most diverse cities in the world, New York. Similar criticisms have been lodged at other New York based shows like Friends and a few years ago I would have agreed with this sentiment but now, I think it’s just pandering nonsense. This might be controversial but the reality is most white people hang around with other white people exclusively. The vast majority of the people I claim as friends are black. If I was to write a show about my life in London, would I be expected to sprinkle in some white people just for the storyline? Media about white womanhood is okay being just that. While Girls didn’t necessarily reflect my experience as a Black woman in an urban metropolitan city, it still resonated with me and I took what I could from it. We veer into dangerous territory as a society if we put forward the idea that we can only engage with media that includes people that look and have the exact same lives as us.
Insecure HBO
Now that I’m deep in my rewatch (I still have two seasons left), I’m kind of shocked it’s taken me this long. Similarly to Girls, Insecure is so relatable that this is definitely a show that you have to watch every couple of years at least. I’ll get into some of my key thoughts below but I have to hold space to celebrate just how amazing the soundtrack is. I discovered so many great songs and artists through each episode and even now, listening to Doechii’s new project and Kendrick Lamar’s new album, I let a tear fall at how much I know Insecure would have loved them both. Issa turns 29 in the first episode which sets the scene for how triggering the whole show is for me (lol), but it’s also rather nice to watch women in their 30s still trying to figure shit out.
We have all known or know a woman like Molly
Molly, Molly, Molly. How many times must I call your name? Molly is one of those characters that I have only grown to dislike more as I delve further into the Insecure universe. Though a caring friend, she is extremely unlikable, judgemental and constantly the architect of her own misfortune. Yet, she still finds ways to blame everyone else. I have a lot of empathy for Molly’s struggle with love and relationships, but it tales her too long to realise that she needs to do some work on herself to make this better. This kind of woman exists in all parts of our lives. We may have known her back in university, she may be a colleague at work or we may even have someone like this in our circles. You may even be that woman.
The writing on the wall for the friendship breakup has always been there
Issa and Molly were great friends to each other, but they were always going to have a blow up. The signs were there from the start. Molly couldn’t help but be negative, pessimistic and share her continuous doubts when Issa shared her plans to throw a block party. Issa, though well--intentioned, often used Molly’s pain as a means to execute some side mission. In season one, under the guise of cheering Molly up after a breakup, Issa takes Molly to a club just so she can spy on her old high school crush. She then proceeds to get on stage and freestyle about Molly’s ‘broken pussy’. I’m sure I don’t need to say any more.
#CheatingGate
One of the best things about this show is the conversation it starts. Majority of us know and accept that Issa was wrong for cheating on Lawrence, but because we spend time in her POV and feel some of the frustrations she had with her unemployed, jobless, birthday forgetting boyfriend; we start to give her empathy and grace. One of my biggest criticisms of Issa during this period is her inability to follow-through. She wanted to breakup with Lawrence before #cheatinggate but chickened out of it. This was her downfall. Of course everyone makes mistakes and being 29 myself, I understand that every decision we make won’t be a perfect one. I really love how the show explores this.
As I’m still watching Insecure, I’ll save my extra thoughts for another newsletter or TikTok video once I’ve finished. A favourite part of sharing my rewatch thoughts is being able to hear what you guys have to say, so head down below and share your thoughts in the comments. And if you haven’t watched any of these shows before (sorry for the spoilers but, it’s been years lol), hopefully this has encouraged you to start.
Until next time x
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